And We Try Again… Mashenka’s Future
Of course, I could just go up to the 18-year-old and tell her, “Look, you’re bright, you’re personable, you could have a lot going for you in your future, but you need to move it, move it.” However, coming from her mother, it might not pack the necessary wallop intended.
So, we do the delicate dance. I toss suggestions to all of the kids. They yawn, most likely intending to live with us until they’re 85.
And if you’ve been reading the news, it’s de rigeur these days. A much larger percentage of young adults than ever before in recent years lives with parents and they link it to no college education, no job and no marriage.
With stats such as those and a certain recalcitrance on our daughter’s part to make a life plan and follow it, the idea pops into my mind that perhaps we should just take charge and tell our kids: this is going to be your life’s work: study it and do it. Oh, and by the way, you will be marrying this person when you get older, so get used to the idea now.
LOLOLOL. Do you ever have these thoughts?
Instead, I talk with her again. We try to narrow down what she imagines she enjoys about this field or that. How she could “shadow” someone in their work to learn more. How she could volunteer in a variety of settings. How she could call this organization, e-mail that agency, or research current supply-and-demand of jobs.
That’s when she informs me that she would like to pursue anything that does not require telephone work, e-mails or research.
“Well,” I level with her for the 100th time, adding something new, “I understand. But I’ll tell you a saying that has proven to be true in many cases: ‘What stands between you and your future is a little discomfort.’ In other words, you must move out of your comfort zone. If you need to make a phone call, then you write a script before you call. If you need to research, we think of search words and stuff like that….
“The good news is, computers rarely talk back….”
We both laugh.
And on it goes. We draw up lists of what she says she enjoys. What she wants to pursue. Possibly. What she needs to find out.
Let’s see what happens. Eventually, she’s got to make a move. I believe she can do it.
—————Tags: coaching kids on careers, easy-peasy careers, how to find your life's work, kids deciding on their careers, Russian Adoption, teens researching careers, young adults living in parents' home