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Destinations, Dreams and Dogs - International adventure with a fast-track family (& dogs) of Old World values, adopting the Russian-Italian-American good life on the go…!

Don’t Let Them Fail

We have a friend who’s a famous sports star.  Now retired, he gives lots of motivational talks worldwide.  When we brought home our first son from Russia, he gave me some powerful parenting advice that’s stayed with me to this day:  “Don’t let him fail.”

He was not talking about our son winning or losing in sports, or whether he would complete a school grade successfully or not.  He spoke, instead, of failing in life.

Our friend came from a rough background where his grandmother had to raise him.  He knew all about hanging with the wrong crowd and throwing away opportunities even before your life really began.

We’ve taken heed to his words of wisdom.  You may think it’s overprotective, or helicopter parenting to the nth degree, but I remember reading a spelling book back when our first was learning the basics.  It said it was better for a child to just copy words over and over correctly, than to guess at them before they were ready for a test.  That would serve to reinforce the wrong response.

Don’t let them fail.  Don’t let them guess at life.  Don’t give them the opportunity to make costly mistakes by too much unsupervised time, whether at the mall, or at the wrong slumber party.  Discuss your family’s values.  Remove as many opportunities to fail until they’re prepared, fully prepared, to stand on their own.

Don’t rush them, don’t push them, don’t trust them and later regret it.  Allow the good foundation to be built under your supervision, rather than farm it out to subcontractors who are not building with love and dedication.

Everybody fails, we know that, but my desire is for my kids to know the sweet taste of success and always press in that direction.  If it takes controlling their environment in the beginning, that’s a small price to pay.

Don’t let them fail.

 

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4 Comments : Leave a Reply

  1. avatar Phyllis says:

    Great thought. With all the “stuff” that our boys carried with them into our family, some success would be a very big boost for them. Thanks for reminding!

  2. avatar Sybil says:

    What a wonderful blog, thank you for stating your thoughts so well. I fully agree with what you said and with what your friend the sportsperson said. We feel that way at our house too and have raised our children in this manner, but to see it put into words was great.

    • avatar admin says:

      It’s so good to hear that this advice has worked for others, too, Sybil! I know you’re very proud of your children and that says a lot. Continued good success!

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