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Destinations, Dreams and Dogs - International adventure with a fast-track family (& dogs) of Old World values, adopting the Russian-Italian-American good life on the go…!

Leapin’ Lizards at the Dacha-!

dacha-2bWe have a city house and a country house, not that the country house is in the country at all, more like the beach, but we call it a dacha.  In Russia, a dacha is a country house, or a shack, usually with no running water, which means a well to pump for water and a rickety outhouse to visit when you need to take care of business.

So I guess ours would not be a bonafide dacha, per se, either.

Now that we have those labels, that defy their actual definitions, under control, we can move forward and be thankful that we have any house in this economy….  Which leads us to….

THERE WAS A LIZARD IN MY HOUSE!

At the dacha, which is not at all a shack, but which may have miniscule crackslizard around the doors, or by virtue of the fact that we open and close the doors like any other normal human beings, a lizard could theoretically dart inside during such an opportune moment.

Now, keep in mind that this is not the first time that this happened.  But, as usual, I was HOME ALONE when such unusual events take place, which is not good in case I have a heart attack and then the lizard would jump on top of me and nibble my nose, or do whatever else lizards do when conquering a very large prey.

There was a time when my second son and I glimpsed a lizard inside, one of the dogs quickly tried to gobble it up in order to protect us all from the evil monster of a chameleon, and then of course, the lizard’s tail fell off and was on the floor, wriggling this way and that, which is what dismembered parts often enjoy doing.  Which grossed me out even more and made me want to faint, great protector of the flock that I am, so I commanded Pasha, who is, after all, a boy, to pry open the dog’s mouth and tell him to “Drop it!”

lizzieWhich he did, and the dog did, and Pasha grabbed the lizard out of the dog’s mouth and put him outside.  Sans tail.

I fanned myself the rest of the day.

So, this time I was home alone, and it was a baby lizard, sort of small and long with short legs, that almost made it look snake-like.  Believe me, there was no time to think about THAT, or I would have fainted, so I just ran for a paper napkin and tried to scoop him up.  And he went into the wriggling, avoiding, scooting out from under the napkin routine.

Over and over I lunged at him, until I finally clamped down on him, carrying said Mr. Lizard to the door.  I didn’t dare take a good look at him, lest his eyes were bulging from my squeezing or some other utterly disgusting display, like sticking his tongue out or something.  I opened the door and threw him outside, where he hit the tiled walkway with a thud.

I think I killed him.  Then I felt bad.

So I ran after him again, which wasn’t hard because he wasn’t moving, but then again, my knees are not what they emmulticarinatach3103once were in terms of bending over again and again, so I picked him up with the napkin and put him in a flower pot full of purple pansies.

He seemed happy there, but I’m not sure if dead lizards can look sad, either.  I believe he recovered, because I did not see him on a subsequent visit to pay my last respects.

Yes, this is a dacha in the springtime, full of wildlife, gardens to be planted, and some days, a drama or two meant to send shivers up your spine.

 

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2 Comments : Leave a Reply

  1. avatar hoonew says:

    Aww, think of the GEICO gecko- cute and smart. At least you got him out of the house.

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