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Destinations, Dreams and Dogs - International adventure with a fast-track family (& dogs) of Old World values, adopting the Russian-Italian-American good life on the go…!

Nighttime Notions

I should really sleep more and think less.  It’s at night when the what-ifs of life seem to strike.

Could I be doing more, helping more, trying harder, adopting more, working smarter, being nicer, taking on extra… when I’ve already got so much going on?  Are these normal thoughts that dance in the dreams of most people, or are they the stuff of tired minds that might major in the minors in the middle of the night?

There’s a heavy rain, a downpour around 3:00 am that awakens Misha, our older Scottie.  He jumps from being curled at my feet and I try to pull him to my side in bed, but he is inconsolable.  He prefers that I just make the rain stop, thank you very much.  There’s no thunder, yet he’s sure it could start at any minute.

I wonder how much alike we are, mother-master and dog.  He dreams at night, and in the daytime, and about any time he and Grisha decide to take a nap.  Their twitches, moans, and muffled barks give indication of doggy adventures.  Do they have any nagging thoughts:  I shouldn’t have chased the squirrel up the tree, I really should not grab for the biggest treat,  I’ll stop poking my masters in the leg anytime I want anything.  Does he consider such things?

Probably not.  His personality approximates Benedetto’s:  oblivious.  As they say, “Ignorance is bliss.”

It might be me.  Could it be that I’m obsessing, or becoming a worry wart?  I’ve always considered that a life well examined, a well-thought-out life is paramount, but now I’m beginning to wonder as sleep flits away, night after night.  So, I work, I pray, I strategize, I make lists.

These are the quiet kinds of things one can do when others are trying to sleep.  It’s not like you can move furniture, or box up old clothes for the Salvation Army, or begin a renovation project with jackhammers.  Productive projects are definitely limited.

So it’s back to thinking and theorizing, extrapolating and exercising, when I should be sleeping.

Are you awake, too?  What’s on your mind?




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8 Comments : Leave a Reply

  1. avatar Ivanka says:

    You should carefully ask such questions…considering the harried audience checking in with you. It is about 9pm my time, and I am not really ready for “spoit”. Of course, I will be asleep in a few hours, for just a few hours. I usually awaken between 2 and 4…with so many things on my mind that I must make a list. About 7 I am ready for a nap. Nyet, not the way of life for me. Mostly, I am thinking about the SDA, how UA seems to conspire against me, how I would love to be able to speak fluent Russian, (probably a good thing that I cannot right now), who do I trust, how long can one be away from home, should I wash clothes (by hand) now or wait till morning, is the Lord pleased with me today, and my newest son actually called me “Mom” today (I smile and rest on that thought for a few minutes), should I change flats, do I want a bigger flat to clean, maybe it would be good when Ivan comes, should I come home now and just come back with Ivan, how will I begin to explain to Vladimar why I am leaving, a 16th birthday causes me to be physically ill, oh and I could go on and on, so I usually get up and get begin to pray for all the people who have asked me to pray for anything for them. I think that I need to focus on something or someone besides myself and my stuff. Are you sorry you asked for an insight into what I am thinking about in the wee hours of my night and morning?

    • avatar admin says:

      No, Ivanka, sounds pretty normal for someone in the midst of an adoption-! (So what’s my problem?) I remember not being able to sleep for the year or two (or four…) leading up to some of our adoptions, then of course, the year after they were home I had to be on high alert all day and all night, then it was about another year until I felt that soothing, soft feeling of “REAL SLEEP”.

      Yes, you should probably wash clothes at night so you can hear them drip- drip- drip as your evening lullabye. You’ll be sleepy-eyed in no time! Don’t you feel better already? As for changing flats, I thought your tootsies were tired, now I realize it’s apartment-flats. No, you can’t do that, I did the Princess and the Pea routine and it’s really very exhausting (just type that in the search function on the blog, lol), but if you want to change your shoes to boots, that’s okay, it’s that time of the year.

      Just keep tuning in to 3-D, we’ll give you plenty to think about and world problems to solve. Here in our corner of the world, we turn the clocks back tonight, which I’ve been very helpful telling people not to forget to turn them forward-! Great minds tend to be overloaded at times…. May these be our biggest problems…. 🙂

  2. avatar Winnie says:

    I’m always awake. I’ll be nodding off and the minute my head hits the pillow I’m thinking about the most inane things in the world. Grocery lists, will I mop the kitchen tomorrow, should I buy a new winter coat. NONE of it important, ALL of it keeps me awake.

    Wish there was a switch for such things.

    • avatar admin says:

      I hear ya, Winnie. I generally keep a notebook, 3×5 cards, pens, a virtual stationery store, lol, next to the bed-! At least you know your stuff is not important, I somehow feel that mine are matters of life and death, or at least fascinating innovations, etc., that MUST be recorded lest I forget them in the morning…. zzzz….

  3. avatar Sybil says:

    Who ever made up that we are supposed to sleep at NIGHT? Isn’t it about 4 in the afternoon that our eyes will shut so easily and we feel like we could sleep and sleep if only we had the chance? At least it is that way for me. I have given up trying to go to sleep at night and spend the hours between about 1-4am reading, praying, planning special parties and anything else that is on my mind. Meanwhile, my husband can fall sleep within 15 seconds anytime, anywhere and without any dreams to wake him.

    My question….why don’t department stores stay open all night. Don’t you think they would do a great business between 12-6am ! lol

    • avatar admin says:

      It’s true, Sybil, they would do a great business! I guess that’s why they made the internet. Meanwhile, my husband who thinks that all things “Black Friday” (shopping day after Thanksgiving Thursday for our foreign readers) are crazy, reports that rather than make people stay in line all night for special sales, several retailers will now “open” at midnight. Sounds promising….

  4. avatar Ivanka says:

    I too, Sybil wonder how it is that the man of my dreams can fall asleep while in the midst of a conversation regardless of the time. It just does not seem quite fair. As for the shopping…I do not trust myself to make wise choices at certain times of the night. But, I love a day of running to and fro getting the best deals (real or perceived) and supporting the economy. Plus, something of a tradition i want to pass from one generation to the next.

    • avatar admin says:

      Okay, good news, Ivanka. Benedetto (news hound) informs me that many stores are now “opening” on Thanksgiving night at 10:00 pm. The time just keeps creeping up and up-! I don’t know why he tells me these things, I don’t recall ever in my life having shopped on Black Friday. Unless going out for coffee counts, lol.

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