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Destinations, Dreams and Dogs - International adventure with a fast-track family (& dogs) of Old World values, adopting the Russian-Italian-American good life on the go…!

Parents’ Date Night

If you are married with children, do you have a date night?  Probably not, statistically speaking.  If you are single with children, do you have a date night?  Probably not, either.  Somehow, our children have taken over our lives.

Not a bad thing, by any longshot.  A puppy could take over my life and I’d have no regrets, whatsoever.  A baby raccoon would be a more iffy proposition, since I hear they’re extremely demanding, and no boarder would ever take them, so that’s a 12 to 15-year commitment with no vacation time….

With our kids, I often feel that I have no vacation time.  Not five minutes for me, but that’s an old and oft-mentioned story.  When they go out with their father, that’s “my time”—not for me, but to get “my work” done.  Great.

But enough about me.  What about you?  And what about connecting with our current (or potential) mates?

Time is a real issue.  For many, money has a way of flitting away once there are doctors’ appointments, therapy sessions, tutors or daycare, extracurriculars, clothing, haircuts, piles of food, etc.

Of course, a date doesn’t have to be expensive.  We often head out for a quick cup of coffee together.  Not the most exciting thing, not something that screams “You’re special!”, but it’s an attempt to connect.

We all know, intellectually at least, that having time for our mates is important.  But how to swing it?  And how much together-time is normal?

Not to be ugly, but if all you can do is take your spouse out on their birthday or anniversary, it really doesn’t show much interest.  Is once a quarter too much to ask, once a month, once a week?  How much time is realistic to go out with someone you love… minus the kids?

Maybe there is no love, no support, no appreciation for one that you once promised to love and cherish… long before there were any other demanding voices in the home.  I’m not sure that an issue like that can be solved or saved by an occasional date night.  But maybe it’s worth a try?

 

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2 Comments : Leave a Reply

  1. avatar Linda says:

    It’s hard to find time together.
    We tend to spend Saturday night together cuddling in the sofa and watching two tv programs together.
    But out on a real date?
    Maybe 2 times during the last 17Months. On our wedding anniversary we went for dinner and a movie, and came home to a hysterical child. And on St. Patrick’s day we actually stayed in a hotel and had a lovely dinner and fell fast asleep by 10pm… Oh well, we had a nice time anyway.
    Other then that, there’s been a few times when the kid has stayed at my mother and we have just spent time together, gone shopping or something… It’s been nice.
    I’d love to do more of it, but we can’t really leave the kid with anyone, except my mother, so don’t want to ask her to babysit too much, as she works 5days a week and is really busy, and she’s really tiered after babysitting even for 2 hours.

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