The Case of the Missing Coat
Our youngest daughter loses or misplaces most everything, from a shower fixture (?!), to her shoes, to homework, to her coat. The latest in the odd series of disappearances is a stylish London Fog raincoat, very Euro chic, and helpful on days when the weather is not absolutely freezing, or when she might be wearing a stack of sweaters underneath, and the quilted winter coat would prove to be too warm.
Naturally, the girls conspire together to keep the negative news from me.
“Good news, Mama, Sashenka found her coat. May I wear my short winter jacket today?”
“Sure, sweetie. Where did she find it?”
I end up confronting Mashenka on the lie, while Sashenka swears up and down on a stack of Bibles that her coat is at the other house. That’s where everything generally is: in the other house.
Of course, until we arrive there. Then it’s back at Point A.
You can see where this is heading, right?
So her father had her look everywhere. My thought is that the girls half-imagine that we will simply go out and buy them another X, Y, or Z. All the more reason to lose it-!
That’s how it was in the dyetsky dom (Russian orphanage). Everything was communal property, so if you lose it, destroy it, swap it… nyeechevoh’ (it’s nothing). Who cares?
We’re trying to teach them to care. We’re trying to get them to use lists. We’re trying to get them to pay attention and be responsible.
Might as well work on nuclear disarmament while they’re dreaming the impossible dream.
At long last, the coat was found.
In the closet. Her closet.
Granted, it had fallen behind some other things, but really? The closet?
The last place she would ever imagine.
Tags: adoptive parenting blog, do your kids lose things?, how to teach children responsibility, kids caring for their own things, overcoming orphanage behaviors