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Destinations, Dreams and Dogs - International adventure with a fast-track family (& dogs) of Old World values, adopting the Russian-Italian-American good life on the go…!

Time to Adopt Again?

How do you know when it’s time to adopt again?  Is it a feeling in your heart?  Perhaps a balance sheet that “works”?  Do you have extra space in your house, or time on your hands?  Did you see a child who “touched” you in some way?

For most of us, it’s not all black and white.  We hope to think with our minds, and be moved by our hearts.  Not always in that order.

Is it economically feasible, we ask.  Not just in the short term, but for the long haul?  Do we need to fund their college, their car, and their spring break to the Caribbean?  Is it enough to think that we have rescued them from a lifetime of outhouses, rotten teeth, and once-a-month sponge baths?  Which also raises such existential ideas of cleanliness being next to godliness.

In our case, everything is very matchy-matchy:  two boys, two girls, two parents, two dogs.  Might be good to shake things up, my evil twin chuckles.  My saintly twin wonders if it’s smart to rock the boat when you’ve got a fairly good thing going.

In order to proceed, do you need a sign from God, or a sigh in your heart?  Do you grab for a calculator to try to figure out:  when they’re 18, I’ll be… 92!  What is realistic?  What is radical?

How much energy does a child require?  Is it more if he’s 5 or 15?  Does the child deserve a claim to one-on-one time, or is it “the more, the merrier” when it comes to children?  If you’re going back to school, or really busy in your career, is it fair to a child for the parent to be spread thin, or should the child simply be left to languish in the orphanage?

Do you need to be perfect… or just very patient?

Have you ever asked these questions???

 

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14 Comments : Leave a Reply

  1. avatar Jessica says:

    Every single day…. I never thought of this too much before proceeding with the adoption of our two boys from Tver…. After living the reality and experience of adoption… I feel like I need to bring more children to a safe and loving home…. But these are definitely questions i ask..

  2. avatar Winnie says:

    Around here it’s the whole matter getting Hubby to come around to my way of thinking, Ha. However since the addition of Mom to the household (which has been a lot like having another child) we are pretty crowded with one bath/shower. I will say the people that built our house had 6 kids though and I’m pretty sure the bathroom wasn’t added until several years later, so who’s to say we need another tub? Personally though the idea of the stress of another adoption makes me break out in a cold sweat, but then again since I’m a veteran maybe it wouldn’t be so bad the 2nd time around.

    • avatar admin says:

      I know what you mean, Winnie. My husband says “No way!” to the paperwork that increased many, many times for Russia over the years. I’m trying to tell him that Ukraine has waaaay less paperwork, red tape, and cost…. Maybe we should hold men’s seminars where they can all vent together-! 🙂

      • avatar Winnie says:

        Personally I’m hoping the birth of his buddie’s new daughter (and the bust a gut pride & love new dad has) will rub off on him a little. It will also help when we are able to move mom into an apartment – keep your fingers crossed we’ll do that before the end of the year.

        • avatar admin says:

          Oh, that would be great, Winnie, if she can be close… but not too close! And it’s true, men often need to slowly warm up to these radical ideas…. 🙂

  3. avatar Sybil says:

    Wouldn’t a little sibling be great for your 4 ! I encourage anyone to find the child that your heart knows already.

  4. avatar AP says:

    nnnnnnnnnnnnooooooooooooppppppppppppeeeeeeeeeeeeeee ;O)

  5. avatar AP says:

    make that nnnnyyyyyyeeeeetttttttt!!!

  6. avatar Sybil says:

    I don’t particularly like travel and in fact when our agency director enthusiastically asked us if we liked “adventure travel”, my reply was, “I don’t like crossing the Golden Gate Bridge, but I will go wherever my child is”. The agency director had in mind the Far East of Russia and it required crossing the frozen Amur river by car when there was no bridge and you had to travel across it on the ice. But, I believe in messages and got mine long before and followed it until my daughter was at the end of that road. LISTEN

    • avatar admin says:

      Amazing– crossing a frozen river by car. Sybil, that’s pretty adventuresome! I’m trying to listen, there are just a lot of details that are involved that are out of my hands. Time will tell….

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