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Destinations, Dreams and Dogs - International adventure with a fast-track family (& dogs) of Old World values, adopting the Russian-Italian-American good life on the go…!

Uncovering the Issues

1_adoptive_russian_041213Leave a wound covered for too long and it’s going to stink.

We as adoptive parents face issues in our children’s lives that would be so much easier to simply gloss over, than to deal with them.  Yet, if we want them to be whole individuals, it’s going to call for some forward movement.

So, we engage in the delicate dance, the old two steps forward, one step backward.  Or, if we want to be totally honest, it may be more like one step forward, two steps backward.  The dance itself is therapeutic, if not for the ground covered and destination reached, then maybe for getting us out of the feel-good, feel-safe, fetal position.

The parent reasons and cajoles, empathizes and sets boundaries, challenges and motivates.  Anything to 2_adoptive_russian_041213sidestep the same, old destructive patterns and downward spirals.

What are the underlying issues, and what are the resulting reactions?  It’s often hard to tell.

Yet, similar to a physical therapist who stretches out taut muscles which try to resist the best efforts, we slowly stretch the kids to venture beyond the comfort zone, uncovering issues, and regaining a full range of motion.

Exhausting at times, but hopefully, it will pay off.

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2 Comments : Leave a Reply

  1. avatar Shelley says:

    It can be tiring particularly when the son or daughter turns the dance into breakdancing. I feel as though the goal is almost to break the parents. When we are all miserable then the child is happy. Do you sense this?

    • avatar admin says:

      Absolutely, Shelley. It calls for a new type of normal and not every child is ready for that in the first few years home. If you can keep your sanity as the parent, chances are, they will gain theirs.

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